


his backpack's got jets

by ohmcgee



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Gen, crackfic, new 52 what did you do, poor bb Timmy, this is not the wingfic you're looking for
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-05
Updated: 2015-02-05
Packaged: 2018-03-10 16:38:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3297248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmcgee/pseuds/ohmcgee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The prompt was wingfic. As the entire trope of wingfic leaves me with a sense of wtf and mostly apathy, this is what happened instead. </p>
<p>Or: Steph and Jason give Tim shit about his new costume.</p>
            </blockquote>





	his backpack's got jets

“You’re like a great, bloody swan. And I don’t mean that like I’ve been reading too much Harry Potter. I mean you look like a huge swan. That’s bleeding to death.”

“Whatever. One of your costumes was like a giant red dildo on your head, you get no opinion on this.”

Jason shrugs. “ _You_ get beat to death, blown up, dig your way out of your own grave and see how good of friends you and sanity are.” 

“Oh my god, is he really harping on about that again?” Steph enters the room with a plate of waffles. “Tim, what are you --”

“It’s my new costume.” He twirls. Jason tries not to completely die. He fails. “What do you think?”

“I dunno,” Steph says, picking up a waffle with her fingers and folding it in half. “Maybe you should twirl for me again, swan princess.”

Jason falls off the _couch_. 

“Fuck you, I can fly.”

“You can fall,” Jason points out, collecting himself somewhat. “Just slower than the rest of us.”

“I have _jetpacks_ ,” Tim emphasizes, like this is going to make his case somehow better. 

“This is because of your crush on Boba Fett, isn’t it?” Steph side-eyes him.

“I do not have a _crush_ on Boba Fett.”

“Please,” Jason says, plucking a piece of pizza from the box on the coffee table. “Everyone has a crush on Boba Fett.” 

Tim doesn’t really have an argument for that. 

Jason’s phone buzzes on the coffee table and he snatches it up, grinning when he sees the message displayed on the screen and motions Steph to come over and see.

Tim narrows his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest; his wings sway a little and they both cackle like the assholes they are. “What did you do?”

“Sent Damian a picture of your very lovely new costume.”

Tim glares and snatches the phone out of Jason’s hands, frowning at the message.

_What a tool._

“You,” Tim throws Jason’s phone at his face. “Are a bad influence. He never even used that word before you started hanging around.”

“Hey,” Jason says. “Us ex-dead Robins gotta stick together.” He and Steph go in for a fistbump.

“Thas’ right, bro,” she says through a mouthful of waffles. 

“I hate everyone,” Tim says and stalks off, wings sashaying behind him.

“Huh,” Jason says, watching him walk off. “I think I just found that costume’s one redeeming quality.”

Steph cocks her head to the side. “The pants?”

“The pants.”


End file.
